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Saturday, October 18, 2008

Day #3O

Hehs ! Cheating P: It's just afew seconds aft th last post PPP:
And whad i wna say is ,
O YES ! I DID IT ! I DID MY LV2O LIC ! :DDD
AFT LIKE 15486751YEARS ! :DDDD

Im happy :D
And aft that , i went into DRYL th acc .. Im not sure if im gna get whacked by this Px
But he gave me permission to continue playing his acc th 3rd last time we talked !
And that was like abt .. th mnth we did that .. hais ..
Nvm . Stay cool , stay cool . Don't fall into pieces . Don't .
Doing this will just make him think that I am not capable of living my life whidout him .
I must let him see that i can take care of myself , and let him live a happy life ..
Let me myself be imprisoned by th acting . Why .. ? Because i choose to . I choose to ..
c:

Th last time i saw him , 3days ago . I was happy ..
I wanted to show him i rli can be th best at whad i do ..
But instead , I let myself be hurt in th chest , gasping for breathe ..
It really hurt .. Th pain .. It felt as though my ribcage was squeezing my lungs ,
not allowing them to expand .. I was going to be out of oxygen ..
Yes DRYL , I was scared .. I was scared to die then ..
Since you were thre , I didn't want my life to end ..
I wanted to see you , I wanted to feel your presence ..
I wanted to continue seeing you happy .
Whad i saw wasn't enough . I want to observe more .
I want to make sure , your appearance wasn't a pretendence like mine was .
I grapped my heart . "Keep beating ! Keep beating !!" I shouted in my head .
I could feel my pulse . Everything went blank for a second . And then , I saw blurred images .
I turned and wanted to see you .. If you had vanished , again ..
No . Th red-shirted guy was still thre , having fun , regardless of th pain im going through on th other half of th court . I was glad . He didn't seem worried . I was sad .. He didn't notice me ..
I tried to calm myself down . Vigorous perspiration did slow down . My heart was beating like normal again . "Great . Thank you .. Thank you for giving me th chance to continue living . Thank you for giving me mroe time to observe th one whom I truly desire .."

I need someone ..
Who needs me ..
6:23 AM